clown

A CLOWN’S DILEMMA

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Either (pronounced eye thur) or either (pronounced ee thur), to me, the former sounds more sophisticated, so i prefer to go with that one, but my habitual tendency is the latter. For my whole life, every time this word comes up, I have to decide how to pronounce this word. life is so full of problems, of conundrums. Of course, this is relatively small, unimportant, but it could just be the straw that breaks the camel’s back, so to speak.

Everything is important, the small, the big, etc. ok, some things are more important than others. even the trivial can be important, I don’t wish to trivialize the trivial. no one stands up for the trivial and I for one, don’t wish to be a leader for this cause, as it seems beneath me. You see, probably everyone feels that way and hence there are no champions for seemingly unimportant causes, but they might actually be ones that are more important than they seem, or visa versa. 

People are willing to stand for many causes that seem important but that really aren’t so important. An example would be like voting for humpty or dumpty, people put a lot of energy into this kind of thing and u can see them waving little toy flags and wearing funny hats to emphasize the importance of their cause, or getting all emotional about a sporting event, which in actuality has no real importance. There are too many examples to waste my time on, so let’s either (pronunciation is up to you) move on or we might waste our time.

I hate to waste my or anyone’s time. I have a thing about waste. I always eat whatever is on my plate. It may seem that I might be avaricious, but no, I can be very generous and magnanimous. You will notice that no word is wasted here. I even collect my own waste and use it for fertilizer.. We have compost toilets where I live. but let’s keep our thoughts lofty, gravity even affects thoughts and words it seems. I say “it seems ” because it either (your choice) because it does or it doesn’t. In my mind I say eye thur, because I wish to be or at least appear to be more cultivated (even to myself), rather than less, to be completely honest, even a little vulnerable, if I may say so. 

I am speaking rhetorically, as of course, I don’t need your permission for anything… only your indulgence perhaps. I am a free clown, at least in my own limited way. I have the right to laugh at bad jokes, it’s a basic human right I believe, however a clown does not have the right to make bad jokes, this is a no no, this just makes people hate clowns. I belong to the clown anti-defamation league. There is a lot of anti-clown sentiment in the world today. To be a clown is often looked down upon. When I told my mommy and daddy that I wanted to be a clown when I grow up, they frowned. They wanted me to be a doctor or something. It was either this or that. It was this.

It is probably easier to cure people then to make them laugh. people can be very serious. People often imagine that their situation is deadly serious, their lives may be at stake or those of their loved ones, they may not have any money for their next meal, and have kids to feed, how sad is that? a clown comes along trying to make them laugh, and naturally they might want to kill him (maybe eat him). it can be dangerous being a clown. We are not welcome at funerals and many other events.

Real clowns, funny ones are a dying breed, they are almost extinct. no one is trying to save them. They should be on the endangered animal list, They could go the way of the dodo bird. If a clown’s jokes don’t fly, like the dodo, he becomes a target, because people expect clowns to be funny, just like you expect someone who is a singer to be able to sing, or a nurse to nurse, a worker to work, a politician to lie, a crook to steal, a wife to complain or to be late, and even though trees don’t move, you expect it to leave (ha, ha), a dog to bark and shit, a mountain climber to go up, a lover to go down, we all have our expectations.

When you are in a row boat, you can either choose one or the other or both oars, it is an either (eethur), either (eye thur) oar/ or situation. It is a clown’s dilemma. Life is ridiculous.