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Either (pronounced eye thur) or either (pronounced ee thur), to me, the former sounds more sophisticated, so i prefer to go with that one, but my habitual tendency is the latter. For my whole life, every time this word comes up, I have to decide how to pronounce this word. life is so full of problems, of conundrums. Of course, this is relatively small, unimportant, but it could just be the straw that breaks the camel’s back, so to speak.

Everything is important, the small, the big, etc. ok, some things are more important than others. even the trivial can be important, I don’t wish to trivialize the trivial. no one stands up for the trivial and I for one, don’t wish to be a leader for this cause, as it seems beneath me. You see, probably everyone feels that way and hence there are no champions for seemingly unimportant causes, but they might actually be ones that are more important than they seem, or visa versa. 

People are willing to stand for many causes that seem important but that really aren’t so important. An example would be like voting for humpty or dumpty, people put a lot of energy into this kind of thing and u can see them waving little toy flags and wearing funny hats to emphasize the importance of their cause, or getting all emotional about a sporting event, which in actuality has no real importance. There are too many examples to waste my time on, so let’s either (pronunciation is up to you) move on or we might waste our time.

I hate to waste my or anyone’s time. I have a thing about waste. I always eat whatever is on my plate. It may seem that I might be avaricious, but no, I can be very generous and magnanimous. You will notice that no word is wasted here. I even collect my own waste and use it for fertilizer.. We have compost toilets where I live. but let’s keep our thoughts lofty, gravity even affects thoughts and words it seems. I say “it seems ” because it either (your choice) because it does or it doesn’t. In my mind I say eye thur, because I wish to be or at least appear to be more cultivated (even to myself), rather than less, to be completely honest, even a little vulnerable, if I may say so. 

I am speaking rhetorically, as of course, I don’t need your permission for anything… only your indulgence perhaps. I am a free clown, at least in my own limited way. I have the right to laugh at bad jokes, it’s a basic human right I believe, however a clown does not have the right to make bad jokes, this is a no no, this just makes people hate clowns. I belong to the clown anti-defamation league. There is a lot of anti-clown sentiment in the world today. To be a clown is often looked down upon. When I told my mommy and daddy that I wanted to be a clown when I grow up, they frowned. They wanted me to be a doctor or something. It was either this or that. It was this.

It is probably easier to cure people then to make them laugh. people can be very serious. People often imagine that their situation is deadly serious, their lives may be at stake or those of their loved ones, they may not have any money for their next meal, and have kids to feed, how sad is that? a clown comes along trying to make them laugh, and naturally they might want to kill him (maybe eat him). it can be dangerous being a clown. We are not welcome at funerals and many other events.

Real clowns, funny ones are a dying breed, they are almost extinct. no one is trying to save them. They should be on the endangered animal list, They could go the way of the dodo bird. If a clown’s jokes don’t fly, like the dodo, he becomes a target, because people expect clowns to be funny, just like you expect someone who is a singer to be able to sing, or a nurse to nurse, a worker to work, a politician to lie, a crook to steal, a wife to complain or to be late, and even though trees don’t move, you expect it to leave (ha, ha), a dog to bark and shit, a mountain climber to go up, a lover to go down, we all have our expectations.

When you are in a row boat, you can either choose one or the other or both oars, it is an either (eethur), either (eye thur) oar/ or situation. It is a clown’s dilemma. Life is ridiculous.

Bursting the Bubble

Bursting the bubble

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Breaking through the programming, suspending belief in all beliefs. opening to the possibility that nothing is certain, that anyone can be deluded at any moment, and thus keeping an open mind to all possibilities and knowing that you just don’t know anything for sure. Accepting the condition of uncertainty, recognizing the implicit freedom that it brings, along with the endless possibilities.

Not being attached to any beliefs. by dropping or suspending beliefs, one is dropping the programming. To regain one’s lost innocence, i.e. william blake. leading to the opening of the heart. All these things are connected. living with a pure heart. it seems the universe supports the pure hearted and things start to fall in place quite serendipitously. i.e. synchronicities. riding the cosmic wave, when all things seem to be going your way and coming to you when you need it.

Treating everyone as though they might actually be divine beings caught in the illusion of being merely people. and treating oneself as, or thinking of oneself as a divine being, in a non egoic way. with our miraculous consciousness, awareness, and brain, our incredible capabilities, recognizing that the entire universe would be worthless if there was no one to be aware of, appreciate, use, or benefit from it. Imagine the universe with no consciousness or awareness, how pointless to have all this phenomenon just suspended in space.

They say, first was the word, the sound, but there can be no sound without an ear and a brain, only a vibration, when the tree fell and there was no one there to hear it, there was no sound, only vibration. there can be no word, if there is no mind to understand it. so first, if there was a first, it was vibration, movement, waves. and realize that there can be no movement without stillness. The contrast is necessary for there to be any differentiation. So, one might imagine, that first was the stillness, and then the movement, the vibration. the source is stillness, beyond all awareness and consciousness. and that may be who we are, beyond the I Am.


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Walking towards the malokka last night I saw the fire in the metal container surrounded by happy people, talking, singing, and eating and I had the thought, being the founder of the community “I created all this”. Immediately, I thought that that could be an egoistic idea, and changed it to, “I created the possibility for this to happen, as the people involved were making it the unique experience it was. This makes me something like “god”, after all, we are given a world of seemingly infinite possibilities. 

Infinity is ongoing, it has no end and so one could compare infinities as some may have been “going” for a longer time or a faster rate than others and hence could be more “advanced”, in a word, larger. There are also some infinities that seem to have no beginning as well and are going in both directions. they must be vast.

Imagine if something is moving infinitely on both ends and is curving and meets to form a circle, that this might be how black holes are formed. or you know how something can infinitely be cut in half, even the most infinitely small thing, so you have infinity going in an ever smaller directions and at the same time, it could be increasing like the edge of the universe at an incredible speed, it boggles the mind to imagine such a thing, just as it is impossible to imagine where the edge of space could be for matter or vibrations to fill. it sounds like a very advanced form of mathematics, “comparing infinities”. googling…yes, physics and mathematics are onto it. IĀ think I will leave it to them.

Maybe the point is, that our minds cannot wrap around some ideas like ever expanding space and ever expanding universe. it makes no sense because how could space have limits, because if it did, like it was enclosed, then what would be outside of that? It just is impossible to conceive, which gives credence to the possibility that all is a hologram or an illusion and that really no thing exists at all. and then there we are, back to zero. welcome to the fog. This thing we call life is a fog, and we are all wondering in it together, lost. It helps a lot to have someone’s hand to hold, to be lost together, so to speak, some might call it love.

And as far as me being like a god, more likely in this form that we find ourselves inhabiting, we are emanations of god or source. We are therefore most likely emissaries of love, creating possibilities for one another. One possibility would be spending some time together.


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What if you found yourself to be the only sane person that you knew of in all the world. Its not a great situation to be in. If everyone else is insane and you say that you are not insane, they are all going to think that you are definitely insane, besides the fact that with everyone else insane, things are just going to get crazier and crazier. Of course, hopefully, there are some small percentage out there that are also not insane, but how to find them?

Isolation is the condition, and we are not wired for isolation. we need each other, we need connection, warmth, love, to be understood, or we will suffer. but that singular sane person is going to feel very alone. One of the cruellest punishments is to put someone in isolation, as they do in prisons.

In a world in which you must pay to enter, live in, and to leave, there is a life-long urgent need to have a constant flow of money. This puts everyone under strain, duress, and stress. It takes the fun out of life. It makes everything very serious, divides humanity, and drives a lot of people crazy.

There are those few who find a way to have a steady and sufficient flow, enough to alleviate much of the stress, but often it is done at the expense of others through some form of exploitation or corruption, and this creates monster parasites that “flourish” amongst us, in the form of business men, banks, corporations, and criminals/ politicians. Some make it like a game, like the game monopoly, and manage to have fun with it.

But to succeed in business is almost as difficult as growing coconuts in Vilcabamba, Ecuador and it can be like a prison sentence, where one must toil many hours of every day, and to fail is not that much fun, because the consequences can be so extremely dire. Due to the seriousness of this condition, we lose the joyful quality that life offers, and only children who enjoy a certain amount of freedom can experience this joy through their constant play, or until they must hunker down and endure the boredom of their daily childs prison, called school, or until they realize that they too, must forgo their play to find a job in order to survive or possibly thrive.

This makes them serious and the art of play, becomes lost in the sobering reality of capitalism.This explains to some degree, how it is that we lose the ability to play. This is tragic, because it is quite possible that “play is the way, ” And everyone goes insane, having forgone play for work, joy for seriousness, which is highly unnatural and sad. Music is so popular and gratifying because it is a form of play, as well as are all the arts. And I firmly believe that having an artistic outlet is a way to maintain ones sanity.

Our community of Vilcabamba, Chambalabamba ( is based on this idea to some degree. If you can recall when you stopped skipping as most all children do, this might be the time that you began to lose your sense of play. It often occurs at the onset of adolescence. How do we regain our sense of play? It might be the way to regain our sanity. That is what I would like to know. All original ideas are welcome or even non original ideas.

Does Nothing Exist?

Does Nothing Exist? If nothing does not exist, then how can it exist? We are talking about “nothing” as a concept, which essentially means, there ain’t nothin’ there. The spiritual meaning which is what my nickname Mofwoofoo means, is that Mofwoofoo means nothing, existential nothing, the nothing beyond your imagination. This might be the nothing we are talking about. Can there be more than one nothing? We can leave that for later.

In this materialistic world “nothing” is totally unappreciated, and is often considered valueless. Maybe this is why people like to think that they are something. I prefer to be nothing. It’s a lot easier, lighter, lighter hearted. Lets leave “form” for another discussion as I would rather talk about nothing.

Perhaps we are only here to deal with existential paradoxes and conundrums or how we have to live with oxymorons and just plain oafish or “oxy” morons (just a joke, nothing personal). Along with having to accept the unacceptable everyday of our lives, like war, poverty, corruption ad infinitum.

No wonder some people find life a bit tough, along with the constant need to be in the flow with money and the necessity to stay healthy, etc., etc.! I should tell you that my previous title was Bagelhole1. I have been thinking about nothing for years and without the need to meditate. I think the key to the Universe might be nothingness that is, the space inside the bagel, the hole. One must pass through the bagelhole if one hopes to attain “nothingness”.

I can imagine that if I was God, I might wonder how come I exist amongst all this nothingness, maybe being God, I would know the answer. And perhaps just to create some meaning out of all this nothingness, I conjured up a diversion that would still maintain the nothingness by creating illusions that didn’t really exist but seemed to. So, I as God created an incredibly elaborate illusion to give purpose to the dimension of time and space, which was just one of the infinite dimensions that I imagined, and time and space without objects both living and/or dead, with “consciousness” being allowed for the living, which included the ability to self reflect and to choose to be ethical for the human species, was necessary to avoid the whole Universe being merely a ghost town with lots of spinning and spiraling, but with absolutely no relevance. That takes us to; Do illusions exist? And the fog deepens.

Everything then could be a simulation and we are avatars or game players. And just like in a dream, you can feel things as though solid, but it seems you never actually get hurt or die, but in our non dreaming state, we have those features because of its dualistic and 3D parameters with the added feature that we can feel, hurt, and die, which definitely adds a dimension to the whole illusion.

Imagine vast empty spaces with nothing, but really if there is empty space with nothing in it, would there really be space? Does space need something in it to exist? Space being the same as “nothing”. Imagine one particle floating in an empty space that goes out infinitely in every possible direction. The particle brings meaning to the vast nothingness. Without the particle it would be an infinite meaningless nothingness, which would be possibly the largest amount of nothingness ever not known.

Now imagine space as a place where space is available. Available for anything. We live in this dimension, where “things” seem to exist. Even though we may reduce ourselves to being only “awareness”, we still enjoy or endure the thingyness that we experience in this dimension. So when there is no time or space, there would also be no nothingness, or so it seems logically.

What would there be then? Another dimension beyond our comprehension and perhaps beyond our ability to even imagine. What would that be? Could it be a nothingness without nothing? Is it really beyond our imagination? But how is that possible? Our imagination has no limits. So, perhaps it is just something that no one has yet imagined. I hope you don’t feel empty after reading this.